I Forget

And sometimes I forget. I forget that he has autism. It doesn't matter. It is absent. It can not be seen or heard. It is when he fits right in. It is when he is accepted by others. When he's included, I forget. That's what happened today. I forgot my son has autism. It didn't cone to mind. This is especially true as he was socializing with others and as he was greeting people who passed by at the park. A little girl played with him. They dug for worms. They were happy. They were playing and using their imagination. They were being kids. Together. No discrimination. He was even told he was cute. Then he made more friends. Two boys. My husband and I watched him play and interact. It was a game of tag then hide and seek. Whatever it was, he was smiling. He was communicating appropriately. He was with two other boys his age. Autism did not matter then. They liked him. When they had to leave, they told JJ they'll see him later. It was great joy to watch that. We gave him space and observed him. He was super happy and content. Just a regular kid. That is all. He fit right in. Autism didn't matter. At that time, it didn't. Not at all. For that, I'm grateful.

JJ, You are Wanted

A healthy child is a happy child and a happy child feels well and a child who feels well will always learn well.

I am so blessed that my son is happy and healthy. He has a lot of energy and is very creative. He loves to learn. He loves to write and read and definitely loves to try new things. I am very proud of him. He amazes me all the time.

He is cherished. He is wanted.

He motivates me to do more and to be more. He is our rock. He teaches us so much. This boy really has a wonderful soul and a heart of gold. I look forward to spending time with him. I often think of activities that we can do together and places that we can explore together. There is no other way I would rather spend my weekends and everyday than with my family. My rock, my inspiration and everything!!!

I want him to have the best childhood he can ever experience. I wish for him to have the fondest memories and to feel the love that both my husband and i have for him. That is so very important. I want him to know and understand that he is our gift. He is wanted. He means so much to us.

He is wanted.

It is awesome now how he is into Loorducation. He knows when I am taking a picture of him and asks questions about what I ma going to say  about the picture and where am I going to put it up. He gives feedback and shares his ideas. that is important. It is vital that his voice is heard and I am so thrilled that he enjoys sharing and expressing himself. We are forever grateful. FOREVER.

He is wanted.

He asks thousands of questions. Repeats hundreds of things. Obsesses over "little" things.

He is wanted.

Paint Me a Picture

One day after school, I had a table set up for JJ. It was covered in newspapers. There were all types of papers to paint on set up. I put out all colors of paint and different styles of paint brushes. It was quite the invitation to paint. As soon as he got off of the bus, he flew to the table. He was very eager to start creating. He expressed how happy and excited he was. He really enjoyed it. This was something that he needed. It was very beneficial. That night he was calm and did a great job with homework.

Take time to paint.

Featuring Guest Blogger from Words and Dexterity

http://www.wordsanddexterity.com/

Bio - My name is T L Holliday. I have a huge mind that can sometimes get me in trouble, but I mostly use it to educate ignorance.

I totally recommend this awesome page. It speaks volumes. The words, the art, the photos. It is all there. This is the kind of stuff that needs to be spread around the internet like wildfire. It is food for the soul. Have a good time reading this guest blog post and when you have the chance, I recommend that you go on over to her website and experience the amazingness that is unleashed from a super creative soul. One who I love very much and am very proud of. Even if she was not my niece, I would say all of this because I totally mean it.

xo Namaste, Dany

Photo taken by Holliday (it is my son's hand and a puzzle piece he was playing with outside a few summers ago)

 

#CONTINUETOEDUCATE2015

Something that never fails to astound me is the lack of humanity in the world. Everyone is worried about who's doing what, who's doing who, who's getting what and how much of it. What does any of what other people do have to do with your life? Why do you care about how someone else identifies? They're not doing it to personally hurt you or to make you feel uncomfortable. SURPRISE! The reason they do anything has absolutely nothing to do with you. Stop judging people based on their race, sexual orientation, gender, religious beliefs, just stop judging people period.

There is no race except the human race. We are a species. We only have different skin tones to better suit the geographical areas we live in. Take animals for example; there are many different species and breeds of animals depending on where you are in the world. Some can survive easier in parts of the world that others cannot because they are born with the traits necessary for life in those regions. But they don't kill each other because of it, they use it to survive. So when someone is racist and violent towards another person that is literally telling you that they have more basic human rights than that person because their skin color differs.

I also don't understand the need to label everything. Why do you need to put me in a category? And then get upset if I tell you that I don't fit in that category? Everyone needs to understand that sexuality and gender is fluid. Being born with certain sexual organs does not determine what your gender is. Each individual person decides for themselves what gender they feel they are, not the gender roles forced upon them by society. Same thing with sexuality. As a human you are attracted or not attracted to someone based on the person they are, not about what's between their legs. Society teaches you to assume everyone is a cisgender heterosexual until told otherwise. We need to teach our kids to not assuming anyone is anything and to accept people for who they are.

Religion is another touchy subject, but I'll shed a little light on it. I have no problem with religion, the problem I have is, again, with the people who "practice" it. I say "practice" because religion is supposed to be personal, not displayed for the world to see and shoved down everyone's throat. And just like gender and sexuality, it is something you yourself decide what best fits how you feel. Religion is your personal relationship with whatever god(s) you believe in, not a love triangle between you, your god, and the rest of the world. There are many different religions and spiritual practices in the world, so it makes absolutely no sense when people try to enforce their religion onto other people as if their religion is the only religion. It also has no business being in law enforcement, but I'll save that for another day.

Being a human is like being an animal; we all look different, have different sets of skills, and were put on this earth unwillingly without a hand book. But for some reason animals have a better understanding of how to live, and they're so simple yet complex to us. How can the very things we call wild and unpredictable be more human and understanding of how life works than actual humans? How can they co-exist with so many other species and manage not to destroy each other or the earth? They stay in their lane, that's how! They take care of each other and their habitats, they don't shit where they sleep.

Just take a second and sit down. Zoom out of your own life right now and picture the world as a whole. All the different countries on different continents spread out in a big ball of ocean. Now zoom out of that image and picture all the planets in our solar system. Now zoom out of that. What do you see? Some people know what that actually looks like and others never even thought to imagine that such a thing exists. It does, and even beyond that exists. There are billions of other solar systems in billions of other galaxies. Just imagine what could be out there. How small does that make your life seem? Small enough to realize all the bullshit in your life? And that most of the things you do, say, and think are pointless because now you see that you were only doing those things because you're a product of society? If it did then you're one of the lucky ones who has the ability to broaden and take their minds to the next level. And if it didn't then hopefully one day it will.

So to end this post I'll just say,

Love yourself, love your neighbor, love your earth and you'll be happier for it I promise.

- T L Holliday

My Boy: Part 82

Field Day happened on Sunday. He really enjoyed it. JJ got to be with all of his karate friends. It was a blast despite a few mini meltdowns of wanting to go in a bouncy house and play games as well as waiting in line for registration. It was sunny and hot so the behavior was more understandable today. That day JJ ate a hamburger and a hotdog. I was so surprised because he has never eaten a hamburger from a cook out before. Ya know, it is the little things. Yeah and it was with organic ketchup. : )

We are working on going all organic for JJ. We have been seeing a difference especially when he takes his omega 3 supplements, multi - vitamins and his fish oil liquid. Going organic costs a lot more than traditional foods but it is so worth it especially when consuming organics helps calm and soothe the symptoms of ASD such as hand flapping and verbal stimming.

JJ participated in a few games and had fun throughout the time we were there playing with other children. It was great because he needed the social interactions with others as he has not been in school, Yes, he misses it. He has been telling me that lately. That is a great sign. I am proud of him. As a desire of mine is to have my son to love learning and embrace it.

My Boy: Part 81

ESY ended more than a week ago but JJ still has been busy reading, writing, and of course, playing and experimenting. He did develop the humming sound again. It started about four days ago. It sounds like a long hmmmm, hmmmmmmmm, several times repeated over again. He used to do this type of stimming before he was able to speak. When he was non verbal, JJ would stim by running back and forth from the living room to the front door, humming really loudly and flapping his hands. Once he began to speak, at the age of almost 4, the verbal stim drifted away. So my husband and I were surprised to hear it again after all of this time, basically out of the blue. Instead of telling him to stop doing it, we asked him why he does it. Now, years ago before we knew he has autism and before we knew what was going on and how to make sense of it all, I would have told him to stop that. I have learned to have patience. As we all know sometimes it may run out but I thank God for learning every day and becoming stronger. It can be nerve wrecking but I try..I try to understand why so I ask him and he tells me it makes him happy. Now how are we supposed to tell a child to stop doing something that makes him happy (of course not self harming or harming others)?


So we took him to the neurologist and the doctor told us to ignore the behavior. Ignore it because it will go away. he might be doing this due to not being in school and having that routine. SO for now, I have not heard it many times today. We will see. JJ told me that he does miss school and that he loves it. He misses his friends and being able to ride the bus each morning and afternoon. It is the little things that mean so much and that are very important.

My Boy: Part Sixty9

Time has been flying by. The school year is almost at an end. Jorge Juan has been super busy. So busy that it i shard to catch up with him. He has been reading up a storm and asking a bazillion questions, like really can not even keep count. Like asking questions as soon as he opens his eyes in the morning. That is a great thing, right? We have waited a long time to hear him speak. His questions are detailed and specific, mostly about animals. Yes, animals- his obsession. he LOVES all animals, all insects and things like that. Oh yes and Lizards must be called by their specific names. I can never call a chameleon a bearded dragon or iguana. Every animal has it's name. That IS that!!! I love it but I do have to admit at times, it gets really exhausting. There is  a lot of repetition. A lot. What do animals eat? Where do they live? Does it lay eggs? Where do they come from? So on and so forth...

We had his PPT meeting last week. He is doing great. On his way and ready for the first grade. Busy..busy. Today we went on a field trip to the zoo. he loved it of course, there were ANIMALS there!!! Woohoo, except, at the end, he did NOT want to leave. He had a mini meltdown but his teacher was able to calm him down once we walked back to the bus. I held it together. I dropped him back off at school and enjoyed the 2 plus hours that were left for him to be at school. Counting down to the last day at school. For the month of July, Jorge Juan will be attending school. It is a special program for children with autism. 

Next year, Jorge will have the same ASD teacher and aides and have a general education first grade teacher as well. He really enjoys taking the school bus and riding with his friends. We believe this really helped him greatly with his social skills and being comfortable around people too. Knowing Jorge, he probably has a million ideas in his head of what he would like to do in the summer. I know a lot will have to do with animals, too. The key is to keep him engaged and focused, learning and having fun all rolled into one. Being on the spectrum must be one interesting ride.

 

My Boy: Part 63

Jorge Juan was chosen for the student of the month. He is very excited and we are very proud of him. It makes a mommy feel good to know that her son is student of the month despite being on the autism spectrum. It is really great and we are thankful to his teacher that nominated him for the title Kindergarten student of the Month.The awards ceremony will be held on this Friday.He has been doing very well the past two days in school which is especially grand because he missed last Thursday and Friday and went only an hour or so on Wednesday due to having a fever. He shot back up to being himself in no time. Now he has been back to flapping more often. At church on Sunday, he was stimulated. As we were in line going fro communion, he was standing in the center of two lines pacing back and forth and flapping happily. I gently put my hand on his shoulder to come back in line in front of us. He repeated the behavior a few more times. I do not know if people were judging him not knowing his situation or what but what I can say is that I would never stop my son for being himself and doing what makes him comfortable and happy even if no one understands it at all. Who knows or cares if they thought he was a small child acting out..not me. God knows my son. That is all we need there.He did well at karate the past two times except for the hand in mouth thing which now seems to be dwindling away. It will get better. He has done his homework. He has been reading and overall well. He wakes up without a problem but once he gets to brushing his teeth or getting dressed at times there is stomping, grunting, No but it gets done. He brings his lunch bag and is happy about that, it gives him yet another thing to look forward to. Cherry tomatoes, raw baby carrots, snap peas,crackers and yogurt, it is what he loves to take with him to school. He plays for  a few minutes outside before he gets on the bus . This morning he discovered my noise canceling head phones and wanted to wear them to school. I told him after school he can because they can get lost. He was OK, only a little upset but better than the meltdown any ole day. He is happy, today is occupational therapy at the rehab center and he love sit. He enjoys going early to play with the kids in the waiting room. Oh yeah and he told me and my husband that he fell in love with two girls at school yesterday while having recess at the playground. He kissed them, yes he did . The teacher sent a note home to me about that. It was cute and funny. This goes to show people that children on the spectrum can be empathetic, sympathetic and show their feelings.

Hey There......

Autism – A Super Ability

http://loorducation.wordpress.com/category/jorge-juan/

Jorge Loves to read. At only five years old, he is reading well beyond his years. He just found out that I am writing some blog posts about him. I told him and he was so excited. He says that he is on the internet now.It is really special for him. If you would like to send a note, card or letter to Jorge, it would be greatly appreciated. He is able to read it all by himself. Anyone that would like to send something for Jorge to read can contact me through here orhttp://www.facebook.com/loorducation or danielle@garagepcs.com and I will give you the address. It is exciting to think of how excited he would be to get something in the mail. Whatever he receives, we will take a picture and post it. Of course we will be sending shout outs Thank You’s!!!

xxoo

Dany

P>S>

Hey everyone!! I am looking for anyone interested in having their child be a pen pal for my son. As many of you know, he is five. Looking for other Kinder children around the world who would enjoy writing and sending things back and for to each other.Please let me know if this is something that you would really want to do. We are in CT so we are looking for out of state and country. Thank you!!
Hola a todos!! Tambien hablamos espanol!!

Short and Sweet

I am looking into publishing my son's journey. Anyone have ideas on publishers or any advice?
My son's journey is in parts and originally I have created it on www.loorducation.wordpress.com, which is my first blog. Check it out. Any information would be appreciated.
I started putting his autism journey on here, in parts as well as I just copy and paste from my original Home blog. Come on peeps!! I know you all can help me with this. I am working at it every day...

Dany Loor BSCS, MEd

In the words of Yoda, " A book, I will publish."

This is just the beginning

My Boy: Part 62

3 places we went today and 3 meltdowns. Yes, it was sensory overload to the fullest. One being because he became attached to a plastic sting ray toy in the dollar store and I told him he could not have it. After that, it was major break down. He just had to have that toy, for some reason. I will admit, sometimes I do get him a small toy or something that he becomes attached to in a store if he in that enthusiast about it, but definitely not today. This was the second meltdown of the day. Teh one earlier being on the way back from Walmart in the car on I95 driving. He was already upset because i would not get him something at the store, I al;ready forgot what it was anyhow...He was screaming in the car, yelling and shouted that he was going to fire all of the people in Walmart and fire all of the people in the world. Then, Then..just then, he said he was going to fire me, yes he did. He said if I did not get him everything he wanted, he was going to fire me. Then he even added, "Do you understand me, Mommy..Do you hear me, Mommy?" I just totally ignored him while driving. He keep going on for a bit an I kept ignoring . It worked cause he got tired and stopped an did did not lose my breath yelling at him or getting angry. It was an overwhelming day for him, well at least a portion of it was because he started the day off great by painting and doing crafts. He had a good time at karate and then Boom. I am grateful that this does not happen quite as often as it used to.Boy, I do not miss it but I thank God that he was able to calm down at home where he then ate and relaxed.He did apologize to me for being a naughty boy and said sorry for hurting my feelings. Today was a day that I remembered he has autism where many days I can tend to almost forget, ya know. He was flapping and doing this thing with the mouth. Lately he has been having an oral fixation- fingers and things in his mouth. For the remainder of the day he watched TV and played. He went to bed with a cool night light he found in the garage. His own bed, alone and he did not even need a story. He just told me to check on him and of course I will, I always do. Everyday, especially the meltdown segment in today, I try to gain more patience and get a deeper understanding of autism and what it actually does to my child. My son is a happy child and he deserves the world. I just could not give it to him today. I did not punish him because it may get confusing trying to understand the whole autism side of things. But he is getting it, hopefully. I just talked to him, then I ignored him. That worked today at least. What a difference from yesterday's outing at Barnes and Noble where he was calm and cool. He played with toys and put them away with no problem. Whatever it is, I pray that he does not feel anxiety or pain.I want him to experience peace and overcome autism.

I am going to have to make him a calming sensory bottle. I have seen several of those projects on Pinterest, if you know of any, let me know.Thank you. I am thinking putting his little animals and the tiny things that he really loves inside the bottle so he can see them float all around when he shakes it.

Au-Someness!!!

Autism – A Super Ability

http://loorducation.wordpress.com/category/jorge-juan/

Jorge Loves to read. At only five years old, he is reading well beyond his years. He just found out that I am writing some blog posts about him. I told him and he was so excited. He says that he is on the internet now.It is really special for him. If you would like to send a note, card or letter to Jorge, it would be greatly appreciated. He is able to read it all by himself. Anyone that would like to send something for Jorge to read can contact me through here or http://www.facebook.com/loorducation or danielle@garagepcs.com and I will give you the address. It is exciting to think of how excited he would be to get something in the mail. Whatever he receives, we will take a picture and post it. Of course we will be sending shout outs Thank You’s!!!

xxoo

Dany

Continuing the Journey...

Ok, so now there is a short time before pre kindergarten starts and my son has been to his primary doctor, ENT, audiologist and then sent to Yale for an MRI and to Bridgeport Hospital for an EKG. It is a lot for a 3 year old to go through but he did and with a smile too. Thank God the results came back wonderful and everything was normal. Anyways, what is normal? 

So, back and forth, here and there waiting etc. It was the first day of school and when we brought our son to the classroom, we told his teacher that he has autism. I was like what is she going to say, what is she going to do..etc. so she told us nicely that she was going to talk to “some people” in charge of “something” (I do not remember that part but it was some people from the BOE). I felt good after talking with her.

We let the teacher know that he really did not talk, he has a brand new diagnosis of autism and that we were their to be the voice for our son and I knew that she was there to help us. 

Now, as we were leaving the classroom, my son sat there playing and the teacher was next to him. I was still there peeking through the window. I remember seeing him take off his sneakers..then I fled yep. This was because I did not warn them that he absolutely does not like to have shoes on at all. So when the day ended they let me know what I already knew, he kept taking his shoes off- all day. For the first year of his life he never wore shoes. He even got baptized with socks only. I did not want to leave him. I wanted to stay with him but I wanted him also to experience socialization.

Ok, so anyhow he was at school now. Even though he could not express himself or let you know his name the teacher and the para professional fell in love with him. They were great. Since he still was not potty trained at the time, they assisted him in the rest room.

Some weeks had passed and we finally got a PPT meeting and this is where we met with the professionals and teachers to talk about our son and to see what services he was eligible for. 

At that meeting was Ms. Matera, my former professor from my Teaching the Exceptional Child class..the one where I put the pieces together and realized my son was showing signs of autism. What a small world…you see I never met her face to face before since that was an online class. So there we were..

God is working here as He has been all along……

(stay tuned for part 4)

So what happened at this meeting was…

My Boy: Part 58

I always say my son or when it is "needed" I say my son has autism or is autistic. Many times I do not have to or need to and just at sometimes I feel the need to specify that my son is indeed on the spectrum. I am very thankful that he is high functioning but when I use the term autism I do not have the need or desire to specify that he is high functioning. I just thank God everyday that Jorge Juan has made so many advances as well he continues to strive and shows progress in many areas. Other than being on the spectrum, he is a "typical" five year old. He loves to play in the dirt, ride his bike, watch cartoons, go to the park and do many things as any child would do. Sometimes, he just does it in a special way, in his own way. That is OK by me. I believe in him. I believe in his abilities in which no label will ever stop him from achieving his dreams and goals. I am proud that he is on the spectrum and proud that he advanced along the spectrum considering when he was initially diagnosed - he did not speak, and was "somewhere towards the middle or beyond" on the scale. He surprised the exact neurologist that defined him at three years old. Last year, he stated Jorge Juan was not showing many symptoms at all of autism and if he did not know any better he would say no to autism. Where did it go? Where did the autism go? Does not matter because my son is happy and healthy and I thank God all the time that we never subjected to medicating him by any means (as once suggested by the neuro due to a melt down in his office). So here I am with a  5 year old Kindergarten boy who loves taking the bus to school and making new friends, a boy who loves to eat snacks and do projects, a boy who shows an appreciation and love for learning and oh yeah, he happens to have autism. No need to specify that he is HF, none at all. Parents of typical children do not state that their children are typical or low functioning typical or whatever- too many labels.

My Boy: Part 57

Jorge Juan usually takes the bus to school. It never showed up today. His regular driver had the day off so I am guessing the sub got lost because at 8:10, the bus still was MIA. So, I called the bus company and they asked for my son's name, I told them and their response was Special Ed? I was taken back a little but I replied with a yes. I was calling them to cancel because I did not want my son to be picked up by a stranger. Anyways, getting back to the special ed part..I do not like the way that sounds at all. I never really have. It just does not fit well with me but I guess they still use that term. As for me, I prefer specialized instruction. That is what it is. He is receiving an education with specialized instruction. Yes, indeed my child is special in every positive way but that term special ed irks me and I realized how much it does today when the guy said "special ed" after I told him my son's name. He has an IEP. He is an intelligent 5 year old who is eager to learn with the rest of his peers. I felt as though he was just labeled as that. He is not "that". He is a boy who loves to read. He loves to dance, sing and play. He is a boy who has autism. Autism does not have my boy. He is a child first, being on the spectrum is last. He is a boy with autism and I want all to know that it is not the other way around. There is no autism with the boy because autism cannot survive without him.

I want people to see past the autism because that is when you truly will see an amazing child with so much to offer this world. It is more than awareness, it is acceptance. After all, my son does not like labels of any kind. I rip them off of his clothes and toys and I will continue to rip them off of him when people try to put one on him.